How To Get A Girl To Like You? It’s actually a very simple three-step process. But of course, I’m going to delve deep into each step so that you have a full understanding of what is going on and why.
3 Step process to get a girl to like you
1. First step to get a girl to like you is Exhibit value
This is what causes the initial attraction. So let’s imagine that everyone has a number floating on top of their heads. This number correlates with how much you can offer the world, the amount of money you have, your looks, your network, your popularity, your knowledge, and so on.
And as shallow as it sounds we’re attracted to people with higher numbers than us, people who are of higher value. Because simply they have more things to offer.
We believe they can make us happier. However we can actually see this number, we can look through someone’s wallet or find out exactly how many people they know. So instead we use our senses to estimate what a person’s value is.
In order to get her to like you, you have to exhibit high levels of value. Now this doesn’t necessarily mean you need to have tons of money, or a nice-looking car or a six-pack, all of those things do scream value and they absolutely will help.
But there are two traits that scream high value more than any other trait out there.
1. Social proof:
let’s say you see someone with a ton of friends, you think to yourself wow he must be a great person and we see him with a ton of girls that he’s always hanging out with, you think wow he must get laid often. This is what people see from a third-person perspective.
If you want a girl to like you, you have to show her that you’re well-liked by others and there’s no shortcut to this. This means you have to hone your social skills to a point where you have an abundance of friends to a point where you can give off an incredible first impression.
Check out our article on deep conversation and start talking to everyone.
Nothing catches the girls or frankly anyone’s eyes more than a guy who walks into a room and he’s interacting with everyone and everyone is just happy to see him.
Someone who projects confidence through their body language comes off as someone who is of extremely high value. If you look at men who have a tremendous amount of power and wealth you’ll notice that they walk and talk a certain way.
In general, their movements are slower and they take up more space. Slower because they know they have control over their world, they’re not in a rush and they take up more space because they aren’t scared of being vulnerable because it’s a biological instinct for us to close up our body when we feel threatened or scared.
And when you see someone acting this way you assume they have something, you assume they are of high value and the great thing about confidence is that you don’t need to be the CEO of a company or the leader of a gang, all you have to do is learn how to imitate this body language.
If you can just mimic their body language you give off the same aura they do. You might say well I can’t fake it, I don’t want to lie to myself, I don’t want to pretend that I’m confident in myself when I have nothing to be confident about.
While confidence is a state of mind. There’s no prerequisite that you need to me in order to be confident or act confident.
You could be a starving unemployed kid who lives in his mother’s basement and have a ton more confidence than someone who makes six digits and upon meeting you people will find you more attractive, of course only if you teach yourself how to do it.
2. Second step to get a girl to like you Exhibit desire
Exhibit desire is what causes the seduction. This step is actually the make it or break it step for most guys out there.
So you don’t have to have sky levels of value for a girl to find you attractive. What you do need however is the ability to show her that you’re interested in her.
See a woman will separate every man she meets into one of three different categories.
- Yes category: This is for men that she’s willing to sleep with and date.
- No category: This is for the guys, she is not willing to sleep with or date. If you ever got friend-zoned by a girl. This is the category that you landed yourself in.
- Maybe category: How it works is if a girl meets you and she finds you attractive she will place you into the maybe category.
In order to enter the yes category, you have to show her that you desire her. If you don’t and there’s only a short window of time in which you can you’ll automatically get thrown into the no category.
This is why so many people who try to text or talk to her way into a girl’s pants get friend zone because you’re not showing desire by acting like their friend.
However, there are two very effective ways to show her that you desire her and they are:
1. Tell her that you find her attractive.
This is a more upfront approach and it works very well because it’s very rare in today’s culture. Now you might say well, what about all those guys who were just catcall women all day that doesn’t work. Well yeah of course because they skip the first step.
When someone who hasn’t built attraction tells you that you’re attractive it comes off as creepy, but if you’ve already been introduced and she does find you attractive it becomes charming
Touch is significantly more powerful than words. Think back to a time where somebody accidentally strokes your hand and just sent tingles all over your body. There is no better way to show a girl that you desire her into touching her.
Now of course you can’t just jump in and start groping a girl, there is an order of what is acceptable. There’s something called the Kino escalation ladder, but essentially it’s an order in which you can use touch to exhibit your desire.
Now in order for you to exhibit desire, you have to do it in person, always in person. This is why I highly suggest you use text to get her to come out on a date with you, then exhibit desire from there.
A key thing to remember is that the longer you wait the more likely she’ll put you into the no category and when you do finally come about telling her that you do like her, you’ll get “the whole all I don’t see you” that way speech because guess what you took too goddamn long and now you’re in the no category. which brings us to the next and final step.
3. Final step is Non-neediness
The final step to getting a girl to like you is to refrain from acts of neediness. This is a little bit different in that it’s a step that consists of something not to do.
There’s nothing more off-putting in the world than someone who is needy is considered to be one of if not the most unattractive traits out there.
But what exactly is being needy? Well, Mark Manson describes it as prioritizing another person’s perception of you over your perception of yourself and that this prioritization leads to all unattractive behavior in men, whether directly or indirectly.
I know it’s kind of hard to wrap your mind around it but here are some examples of needy behavior:
- Changing the way you act to try to get her to like you.
- Constantly texting her.
- When she does something you don’t agree with you don’t say anything.
- Buying things for her.
- Seeking validation.
- Getting angry when a girl rejects you.
There’s a whole lot more but you kind of get a gist of it. What’s important is the following. The most effective way to not be needy is to adopt what’s called an abundance mindset. This is when you know you have multiple options available.
Take for example a salesman who closes which means he makes a sale every single day. Let’s say one day he just happens to not make a sale. Does he get flustered? Does he get angry? No, because he knows he’ll close a sale tomorrow.
This all comes down to understanding the numbers game. To adopt an abundance mindset you can have all your eggs in one basket. Because if you do then that one basket becomes precious and signs of neediness will appear.
Never limit yourself to one girl unless you’re dating her don’t only talk to one girl because you will instinctively start acting needy because she’s the only girl in your world. Approach and talked to many girls. Have as many girls as possible in your friend group.
This way you’ll naturally avoid any signs of neediness. When someone needy expressed his desire he becomes creepy, when someone who is not needy expressed his desire he becomes charming. It’s a fine line but a very distinctive one and that’s it.
These are the three steps that you need to achieve in order to get her to like you. Show signs of high value, then immediately show her that you desire her and no matter what avoid becoming needy, because if you do it’s game over.
If you found value in this article please do share it with your friends. Remember guys anything can be learned and anyone can learn them no matter how poorly you view yourself. I assure you that this stuff can be learned and eventually mastered.